There are a few family preservation organisations here in the Buffalo, New York area serving primarily inner city residents. Of course, I do wish there were more opportunities for those outside of the city. Nevertheless, I am proud and excited to see yet another family preservation programme helping vulnerable Buffalo families. This is an astounding improvement from the terrible era of when Catholic Charities of Buffalo found every excuse in the book to take away a mother’s, or widowed father’s baby, and give those adoptees lifelong discrimination. I hate Catholic Charities with every fibre of my being and the “good” that they do for some can never replace the atrocities they have committed when it comes to tearing apart families and lifelong discrimination of adoptees. Of course, they aren’t the only culprits. Now, to only see Adoption Star vanish.
Buffalonians are learning. They are learning the benefits of keeping families together and helping families. We are progressing here in Buffalo, New York and no longer allowing family shame to be the reason to lose babies to adoption. We are no longer looking the other way and claiming it’s not for us to get involved when cases of domestic violence occur. We are breaking the cycle of single motherhood.
Who is at the forefront of this change? Let’s take a look at some of them.
Mother Teresa Home- this Catholic run home for pregnant mothers and mothers of children until the age of three is located on Buffalo’s very rough east side. Formerly, a Polish and German area this area now serves to help primarily Black American mothers and their children, although mothers of all ethnicities live on the east side and come to Mother Teresa Home. Opened in August 2016, the Mother Teresa Home is run by Catholic nuns of the Buffalo diocese. Here, adoption is not offered on the table.
Unfortunately, adoption is still offered at St. Gianna Pregnancy Outreach Center where the myth that adoption will save babies from abortion is believed. I just wrote them to tell them that adoption causes trauma to mother and child, separation with the biological family, and lifelong discrimination for adoptees and to please promote legal guardianship. Other activists can do their part in asking them to promote legal guardianship when family preservation is just impossible.
The Mother Teresa Home provides spiritual counselling, financial counselling, free daycare, parenting support, parenting courses, mental health counselling, domestic skills, finacial planning and financial skills, parental involvement when your child is school age, vocational training, a place for mothers and their babies to live for the first few years, finishing high school or obtaining a GED, assistance in landing an interview, and more.
The Mother Teresa Home is opened only to pregnant mothers and mothers of babies ages newborn to age three who have been evicted from their homes for getting pregnant or are for any other reason homeless. Ages 16 to 26 are welcome to stay for 18 months.
Buffalo Prenatal-Perinatal Network- Also serving in primarily Buffalo’s urban communities on the west side and east side of Buffalo, Buffalo Prenatal-Perinatal Network offers various programmes to keep families together. 80% of the mothers they serve are women of colour, as the east side is predominately Black American and the west side is predominately Latina American with a growing Southeast Asian immigration population, along with a small percentage of European American families still residing on what used to be a very Italian neighbourhood. They also service south Buffalo, a very Irish American community, Cheektowaga which is a predominately Black American and Polish American town, Lackawanna which is primarily a Muslim and Black American community, and parts of Tonawanda which is a very racially and economically diverse area, and parts of Hamburg which is a very economically diverse European American town. One great thing about the programme is that they remember the importance of fathers. Often fathers want to be involved, but are not shown how or are purposely neglected. The Responsible Fathers Initiative is their 13 week programme that teaches fathers, including young teenage fathers, parenting skills, discipline, being a nurturing father, earning a degree, and job training programmes in order to support their children. Basically, it teaches them how to be a man and a dad. Healthy Families NY teaches child abuse prevention, parenting, healthy choices for families, child development, and self sufficiency. The Community Health Worker Program helps mothers from the tender age of 14 to the age of 44 prevent future teenage pregnancies, prevent premature births, provide postpartum assistance, obtain health insurance, get food and clothing, provide immense support, and a place to live for moms and their children. They have been successfully helping low income families for five years. Of the 2,658 Buffalo and Buffalo suburban families they have assisted, half of the pregnancies of pregnant mothers they’ve cared for have had preterm or low birth rate babies, child abuse has decreased immensely, almost 100% of the babies have their immunisations, and CPS calls are rare. The organisation does well to remember that most of the young parents and low income parents they are assisting come from horrible childhoods themselves, or have escaped from domestic violence. In fact, all mothers in the programme are screened for drug abuse, depression, and domestic violence. Support is given to these women, without their babies and children being automatically given away to adoption.
Exposing Adoption 